posted 2017-09-25 09:56:18

Location does matter... life is so much better in the south. People arenít assholes here, for the most part. I donít feel the need to medicate or self medicate to deal with my disdain... Iíve been off Zoloft for 3 weeks and I havenít felt better.

Starting weight watchers again today...

permanent link

posted 2017-09-24 13:03:59

I was convinced the world would end yesterday.

Ever since I was a kid I loved watching Unsolved Mysteries and the like, and every time they mentioned a prospective date for the world to end, be it thanks to an asteroid, biblical prophecy, Mayan calendars, etc, I would always keep that date in mind and wait all day long in hopes that I wasn't suddenly dead, along with everyone else. I was a weird kid and I'm still weird.

Yesterday was the latest day internet whack jobs had said the world would end, thanks to Nibiru, or "Planet X," which apparently is a planet in our solar system that has a highly elliptical orbit and NASA has kept a secret from us. Because of course they would. Planet X was headed for Earth Melancholia style and there was no getting out of it. But the people who have been talking about this event had connected it to a line in the book of Revelation thanks to an alignment of stars and the moon in the night sky. This is the sort of thing 10 year old me would have taken as very strong evidence for their case, but nowadays I laugh about it, because really, I've seen plenty of these dates come and go. For once, an irrational fear had been conquered.

Until Tuesday with President Fuckface's declaration to "totally destroy" North Korea. All of a sudden, my greatest fear, nuclear war, seems like it will be what kills us all on 9/23, and not a planet that doesn't exist. I kept my eye on the headlines; anything about North Korea seemed like a death sentence to me. And after reading of a possible earthquake, or nuclear test, in North Korea and ensuing American bomber drills off the coast of the peninsula, well... let's just say I was sure we were going to war.

The thing is, I know this is still an irrational fear, even though I still perceive the threats to be very real. Two egomaniacs with access to nuclear weapons and no concept of the fact that millions of innocent people will die just scares the fuck out of me. I really feel like we are living in dangerous times, but at the same time, I keep telling myself that as bad as this all looks, it probably looked a whole lot worse during the Cold War.

I also reminded myself of a coworker's old email signature. A little quote from Charles Schultz.

"Don't worry about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia."

permanent link

miss misery:
posted 2017-09-23 06:55:20

Life has entirely been turned on its axis for us here. At the end of July I was struggling with my mobility and at risk of being unemployable. I'd done about four consecutive unsuccessful interviews for roles that were practical on paper, but not great career moves or inspiring for me.

I had to relinquish my control entirely and get surgery, a bit of a humbling experience. I had some concerns about the effect of handing myself over to surgeons and fate upon my own mental health, and that I'd give up fighting.

DH proved himself beyond all hopes in his care and concern for me, but has since gotten a more regular working schedule. Although his contract is still pending, the work has continued.

A colleague and good friend also spotted a job advertised and thought of me. I was in two minds regarding applying, but the application fell together. I was happy with the application, then was offered an interview (before the advertised job applications closed!!!!!). The interview went well. Remarkably. Since then, things have happened so quick. Anyway, by Friday afternoon I've had my new qualification I applied for in June approved and have been employed in a role that reflects my new level of qualification. Gasp!!!!!!!

We've just gotten back from a day out, DH and I. We had talked about attending a annual carnival for years and never been able to afford the day out. After 8 years, we did it. The start of life changing for us and having some of those things we've missed out on or postponed. This is the life I wanted for DH.

    reply by Epigenetic
    reply by monkeys
permanent link

the best of fschmidt:
posted 2017-09-22 18:33:08

"Anyone who believes that the world is ending, please send me your money. If the world ends, you won't need it anyhow."

permanent link

posted 2017-09-21 01:56:27

It was my (dating) anniversary on the 19th.

I guess that shit is considered irrelevant once you get married but I don't care. I bought us a thick slice of chocolate fudge cake from the local diner and we fed it to each other while we watched TV.

    reply by Epigenetic
permanent link

The Dean:
posted 2017-09-18 19:27:34

You're the most important person in your life.

permanent link

good girl: Hurry, hurry lover...
posted 2017-09-18 16:15:19

...come to me.

Yesterday I could have died.

He told me that He received a message from a girl asking Him how His search was going. And He told me that He told her that His search was going very well; He found a girl that has more potential than any other girl He's known. He told me that when she asked Him what it is He wants and what He's been looking for all He could think of was me.

It felt as though I might burst on the spot.

He has a list of bullet points on His profile and she asked Him which of the bullets I embody the most. I don't yet know the answer He gave her, but He did tell her that I embody all of them.

I told Him which one I identify with the most, and He was incredibly pleased. It's the one He would have wanted me to say. It's not the one He told this girl, however, as it would have taken explaining.

I'm just glad I've pleased Him.

So now He wants to know my #2 choice and my last choice. I hope I pick the one He thought of. Either way, it will be so interesting to find out what He thinks.

I feel so close and connected to Him. And that feeling grows each day.

There's no doubt in my mind that I am the luckiest woman in the world.

permanent link

posted 2017-09-17 08:40:57

Bernie Sanders isn't crazy. The American status quo is crazy.

permanent link

posted 2017-09-12 01:49:14

definitely miss silver and umber a lot more than i miss teal. still trying to figure out ways to get silver and umber to hang out with me, years after i broke up with both of them.

a little more than a week left in my self-imposed one-month post-breakup dating ban.

anyone new i date needs to be:
- as fun to talk to as my coworkers
- as into me as silver was
- as attractive to me as that guy i dated for a couple months once (when he had his hair cut and cleanshaven)
- as into my hobbies as umber was
- as clean and organized as teal

right now the idea of dating doesn't sound great because it would mean i'd need to clean/organize my room. who wants to do that anyway.

permanent link

posted 2017-09-11 22:59:50

I have a scottrade account that I fool around with, like to play the ponies so to speak, and I just bought like 1600$ worth of these people. Weird story.

permanent link