posted 2025-01-06 21:04:47

Today I was on the elliptical and started feeling like a physical weakness in my body, sorry of light headed a little dizzy maybe, hard to explain. I had it a bunch of other times over the years. For awhile I thought maybe it was too much magnesium supplementation, then I thought it was related to my Prozac, I've had blood work done and my blood pressure checked, frequently I can do cardio or whatever without the problem. Anyway, I stopped at 24 mins and had to cool off for a bit, then I got angsty and anxious and upset. I've been sort of dieting recently, but not in an extreme way, just not eating sweets and fast food and chips, and trying to eat lots of veggies and fruits, but a huge part of me wants to go hard and lose a lot of weight again because it's hard being big for lots of reasons. All that to say after cooling off I ate a bunch of cheese and peanut butter and then felt bad about it, and still kind of do. I've had a decent first 5 days of 2025, feeling good, exercising, built up my garage gym trying to get back to some regular lifting. I'm sick of being tired and weak feeling. I miss the days were prozac was really working for me. I felt whole, I felt normal, I'm turning 39 and I feel like I'm in my 60s already. I'm cutting down on my Prozac, I think it's been two or three weeks at least, from 80mg down to 40mg. Maybe what happened today was related to that. My friend got me a keyboard for Christmas, it inspired me to start learning, been about a week and I feel like I'm picking some stuff up, but I'm already losing patience. I'm so scatter brained right now. Hopefully this is a helpful process to like it all out in a journal.